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I'm lying awake in the middle of the night desperately homesick for London! I never lie awake at night. It just doesn't happen. I sleep! Very easily. Anywhere, anytime I get the chance. But right now, I'm lying awake aching to be back in London. Reminiscing all the wonderful things that made up my life in London. I miss it! So much at times that it hurts.
It's a strange thing though, as it's not like I'm unhappy with my life here. In fact, quite the opposite. I love my life. Even more so now as the pressure of assessment is currently non-existent given that I'm on uni holidays. Simply put, life is good. I survived a rather stressful and difficult semester, and I begin the final semester of my degree next week. All things going well, I'll be finished inside four months ... and then I can celebrate the culmination of four years of hard work. Then I can call myself a teacher!
And life isn't just about studying. I enjoy so many wonderful experiences along the way. As crazy as it sounds, I love my job! Or rather, my jobs ... as I'm now working on three very different research projects and I'm thoroughly enjoying the challenges involved in all three. I practically live at uni (even on the holidays!), but I love being there ... I love the atmosphere and social side of being at uni. I love sitting at the cafe and catching up with friends. I love knowing so many people that there's always someone to talk to. I love that there are opportunities for me to return to uni at some point in the future, if and when the desire leads me back.
Away from uni, I love that I can still keep active. I treasure the experiences I've had with CanTeen this year, and all the young people I've met along the way - I'm so excited about doing more now that my time is a little more flexible. I love that I've managed to step back enough at Guides that I'm enjoying it again! It was such a valuable step to take. I appreciate the opportunities I have in SES to do something real for the community, and all the training and knowledge I'm picking up along the way. I love that I still find myself wanting to do more ... there are so many other organisations and activities I could be involved with ... but even more so, that I know now when to say no and when to save things for another time.
Above everything else, I love my family and friends. I love being at home. I love being so close to my family. Having family nearby, with their unfailing love and support, makes everything in life so much easier. I love that I'm only a relatively short flight from my sister and my new (as of last weekend) brother-in-law ... and even more so, that I'll be close enough to visit when their baby arrives! I can't wait to be an Auntie!
I treasure my friends far more than they'll ever know. They add so much to my life, and make it so much more special than it would ever be without them. My friends nearby add the fun and constant friendship ... a reason to go out regularly, to relax, to unwind, to catch up and forget about or at times pull to pieces all the stresses of life. Without my friends at uni, I would never have made it this far ... we really are all in it together, and I can't imagine trying to make it through without them. Work has provided me with an unexpected supply of new friends and support as well ... one in particular who I'm so thankful to have met.
And on top of all that, the internet conveniently keeps me in touch with friends far away. I love that I can chat to a friend in Melbourne as though we practically live together ... the constancy of that availability is priceless. I love that the only barrier in catching up with friends overseas is juggling the time differences ... I can email, chat, talk or video call as often as suits. Keeping in touch is so simple! Although as always, I do wish there was more time for it ... I wish I could keep in touch with all friends as well as I do with some.
Overall though, I'm enjoying life. I'm doing exactly what I want. I'm achieving everything I set out to achieve. I'm heading in the direction I chose to travel. I'm enjoying myself along the way. I'm building a rich, colourful, adventure-filled life full of wonderful memories. I have enough struggles to appreciate the high points. I have enough thrills to make up for the struggles. I really have nothing to complain about!
And all the same, I'm lying awake in the middle of the night desperately homesick for London.
I guess life would be terribly ordinary if there were no wonderful memories to reminisce over.
How exactly are you supposed to dress for temperatures ranging from 5 to 28 Celsius?? Seriously ... I need to know! I imagine layers are the key, but still, it's not an easy task. Yet this is something I'm being faced with all this week.
I started my third prac on Tuesday (with Monday being a public holiday ... more on that in a moment), and I'm doing this one at a little school in Ipswich. This involves travelling west about an hour and a quarter each day, ending up a fair way inland ... with slightly wider temperature ranges than are usual here by the coast.
This morning, I believe it got down to around 5 degrees. We had a late start today, and I didn't get to school until around 8am ... but even then, it was COLD. I wore a skirt in anticipation of forecast highs, and at around 8am, I nearly froze! It was soooo uncomfortably cold. I really needed long pants and closed in shoes.
But then, by lunch time it had warmed up and apparently reached 28! That's not just warm, that's approaching uncomfortable up here with the added humidity. At least I was dressed suitably for the heat - the teacher I was with was in tights and a long sleeved top.
Such crazy weather to try to dress for! I just can't work out how best to approach it. Why can't Mother Nature just pick a season and stick with it?? My wardrobe would really appreciate the simplicity.
Meanwhile, Monday's public holiday. It was Labour Day in Queensland. Same holiday every year. Not a "real" public holiday ... one of those convenient ones usually only recognised by banks, schools, government departments and offices. A fabulous excuse to go shopping or catch up on any number of tasks.
Not this year though! Suddenly, someone, somewhere, decided that it's a fabulous year to stop opening on Labour Day. And suddenly, with no warning or announcements, everything remained closed. Not even the supermarkets were open! How ridiculous is that!?
It's not like it's a serious public holiday. There's no religion attached to the holiday, no national celebrations or time for remembering past heroes. It's just an excuse for a day off, like the Queen's Birthday holiday or the Ekka holiday. For those in relevant industries, it's a great opportunity for making a bit more money thanks to penalty rates. For the rest of us, it's a long weekend.
Except for this year, when we received no notice that nothing would be open!!! I drove around in circles trying to find somewhere to buy a notebook ... and ended up at the local IGA with the entire population of my local area. Insanity!!
In more convenient news ... tomorrow is a public holiday in Ipswich! So I can at least have my convenient catch up holiday tomorrow, with everything near home being open as usual. Got to love that!
I'm so in love with my gorgeous new MacBook! It's just beautiful. So pretty and stylish! And so little ... so light and portable. And the battery lasts beautifully. And the cute little case I got for it is so handy and small. I love carrying it around with me.
I'm finding my way around it far more quickly than I anticipated too. I knew Macs were user-friendly, so I shouldn't really be surprised. It's just so easy though ... I love it!! Things just work. No hassles. No dramas. Just simple fun.
One of my highlights so far ... a fabulous little widget that finds and displays the lyrics of the song currently playing in iTunes. It's soooo handy! One keystroke, and there on my screen are the lyrics to the song I'm currently listening to. I love it!!
And speaking of music ... I have a new addiction! Jason Mraz ... love him! His music is incredibly addictive. I bought his most recent live album a week or so ago, and have been playing it almost non-stop since. Tonight, I bought another album ... Mr A-Z. So far, loving it easily as much as expected. Looking forward to the new album. New music is such fun!
Hmm, and it's supposed to be inspiring me to continue studying, but instead seems to be distracting me far too easily. Oops! A Saturday night in really must be used productively in order to justify not being out having fun. I better get back to it.
I've just gone an entire month without blogging! I have no monthly archive for February 2008. That's so very slack. It has happened once before ... October 2004 from memory. But in October 2004 I was living in London, travelling loads ... visitors from home, plus parents over and a road trip through Europe. There was a pretty good explanation for my lack of posting that month.
But last month ... I have no excuse. It was pure laziness. I wasn't even studying ... I was on holidays the entire month. Admittedly I was working a fair bit. And I had a trip to Sydney with CanTeen one weekend. A visitor from Mexico another weekend. Peer mentor training and so forth at uni. A few callouts with SES (even a request to go to Mackay, but I couldn't make it because of uni ... grrr). Voluntary prac at my last prac school. Gumnuts started back again. Quite a few meetings. Catching up with friends.
I guess I've been busy. And busy with non-uni related things, which means there's very little need to procrastinate. So perhaps that's the problem! Now that I'm back at uni I'll be procrastinating loads, and the blogging will perhaps pick up again. Sounds logical to me! And on that note, I need to share the latest PHD Comic ... it's rather frightening just how much I can relate to it!
We're less than a month into the new year, and I suspect I've already found my favourite movie of the year. This afternoon I saw 27 Dresses for the second time, and loved it just as much as I did the first time around. The second viewing wasn't entirely planned, but I caught up with a couple of friends today, and while trying to decide on a movie it became apparent that they were both rather keen to see it, and I certainly had no objection to seeing it again ... so it seemed a logical choice. So glad ... reminded me just how much I loved it! Kevin is absolutely one of those fictitious guys that just doesn't exist in real life. Add him to the ever-growing list.
Meanwhile, in a completely irrational line of thought ... it also made me realise how much I miss my filofax! It makes absolutely no sense for me to keep using one ... I have a gorgeous PDA which I love, which effectively runs my entire life, contains my diary, my contacts, my email, my notes, a lovely collection of photos and random word and excel files, and conveniently synchronises with my computer. And it fits in my pocket! I can take it anywhere, and I don't need an oversized bag to carry it around in. It really is a far more practical option!
But I still miss my filofax! Being able to open it up, and flick through the pages, scribble notes wherever I want, add stickers and drawings, slip things inside the cover or behind the pages, attach post-its and store business cards. It's so handy! It's so personalised. And then there's all the handy filofax info ... international information, notable dates, weights and measurements, clothing guides, time zones, temperature guides. Ooh, and I had the most handy London and World maps.
Hehe, it's amazing what you find when you pull out an old diary! I've got all kinds of things still stored in my filofax. Loads of stickers ... those photo ones, that you used to be able to get in photobooths in shopping centres. Some so old I barely recognise myself! Way back to high school. Crazy! And a numerology chart that a friend of my grandparents did for me. A bunch of travel tickets from London. Old photos. Tube maps. Scribbled notes. So many memories! It's like opening a time capsule into a past life!
A month or so ago I got a new car. A gorgeous little purplish-blue Honda Jazz which I love to bits and have had a fabulous time driving around (for over 2000km already!). Of course, there are many differences between it and the Peugeot 206 I used to drive. The Honda Jazz is brand new, and an auto (I've always driven manual until now) ... so most of these differences are positive, and certainly make up for anything I'm missing out on.
There are little things that I miss though. Like the way the headlights on my Peugeot would turn on automatically when it was dark. Or the way the windscreen wipers were automatic (although this often frightened the living daylights out of me when I wasn't expecting it!). And the electronic alert that would tell me how many kilometres I could drive before running out of fuel. Such useful features! I was perhaps a little spoilt I think.
Coming into summer, the thing I'm missing most at the moment though ... the temperature reading! The little display in the centre consol that told me what the temperature was outside. Not an entirely uncommon feature in cars these days, but the Jazz doesn't have it. I don't really have a thermometer anywhere else, so now I have no idea what the temperature is at any given time.
The one exception to this is that they've just installed a new electronic sign outside the carpark at uni, so as I arrive at and leave work I can check the current temperature. It doesn't tell me what it reached in the middle of the day, but it's enough to tell me I'm relieved to be working in air-conditioning! This morning as I arrived just before 9am it was already 32C!! We're in for a long hot summer I think! I'm certainly starting to question my own sanity in booking a holiday to Darwin in mid-January.
I need to vent. It's been a long while coming. My pet annoyance of the moment - traffic controllers. They're doing my head in!! How many completely useless traffic controllers are there in the world? Or are they all in Brisbane? Seriously! Just because they have fluoro yellow vests they think they're brilliant. It's like some ridiculous power trip. I have a fluoro vest and a lollypop stop sign ... bow down and obey me mere road user. And it doesn't take much to recognise how much they're screwing things up. If they didn't delay my commute so much, it would actually be rather amusing.
My most recent notable traffic controller incident was this morning. There is construction going on all around my uni - has been since before I started my course. And with construction unfortunately comes traffic controllers. I'm getting used to them and their annoying ways - holding the signs at such an angle that you have no idea what they're actually wanting you to do; stopping single vehicles just to one of their own vehicles out; paying no attention to the traffic around them; generally just being annoying. This morning was priceless though!
There was a massive semi-trailer stopped on the road in front of me. It was completely blocking my lane, and the road veered around the corner around a building so I had no way of seeing what was coming in the other lane. As such, I was basically stopped behind this semi-trailer waiting for it to move. I couldn't see anything, I couldn't go anywhere. And it sat there for at least five minutes! Ridiculously frustrating. These construction people seem to have no clue that a university campus means students trying to get to class on time. Or perhaps more importantly trying to get to the coffee cart in time to get the essential morning coffee and then get to class on time.
Anyway, I was stuck behind this semi-trailer going no where. And this ridiculous traffic controller was standing there behind the semi with a stop sign. As though I needed to be told I couldn't drive into a semi-trailer a hundred times bigger than my car. As though holding a red lollypop stop sign is more clear than a massive truck blocking the entire lane. Fabulous use of his time, I'm sure. Meanwhile, another traffic controller stood around the corner controlling traffic at his end ... non-existent traffic that is! Not a single car came through or was stopped after the five minutes. So instead of the other traffic controller stopping his empty lane and letting the three or four cars in our lane through, we all just sat there waiting for the semi to move. It was ridiculous! All they had to do was check that the semi driver wasn't going to turn suddenly, and we could have passed. Communication ... it's not so hard!
But no, we all sat there. And at the end of it all, when the semi finally moved I started slowly crawling towards where the useless traffic controller was standing prior to him actually moving off the road - crawling towards him, not even reaching him until he was off - and he glared at me and made rude hand gestures. After I'd sat their patiently putting up with his ignorance and uselessness without a word. Grrrrr.
Ooh, and while I'm on the subject ... I have to make mention of the useless woman down this way who decided a few weeks ago to continually stop two lanes of traffic to let a single lane of traffic out of a side road into an intersection which is totally capable of self-managing (as it always does) purely because there were road works happening on the side of the road. Road works that were slowing traffic down marginally, but hardly affecting it enough to justify stopping traffic. The entire road - two lanes in both directions - was gridlocked as a result. This was the same woman who made a huge mess of the roundabout near our cenotaph on Anzac Day while huge numbers of SES people stood by in orange and watched in amusement. Ridiculous power tripping traffic controllers.
I seem to have completely lost all ability to post regularly. I'm not entirely sure what it is that's stopping me. Time is obviously a factor, but to be completely honest ... I could always find or make time if I needed to. Motivation also seems to be lacking somewhat, or perhaps inspiration more so than motivation. It's a little disconcerting really. I need to somehow reignite the desire to post.
I think I'm wasting too much time on Facebook, and spending more time than I usually do emailing. These activities seem to be taking the place of what time I would usually spend blogging and reading the blogs of others. And as much as I enjoy Facebook and emailing, I think I need to return to my traditional release ... life doesn't seem quite right without the world of blogs.
For now though, I need sleep. After SES Working Safely at Heights training on Sunday, uni and Brownies on Monday, yoga, uni and a Qld Roar training session Tuesday, then uni, Gumnuts and SES yesterday ... I spent most of today relaxing and ultimately being rather unproductive. Not something I really had time for! So tomorrow, I must get up and study. I must have something to show for my efforts at the end of the day!
I just checked in and printed my boarding pass! This time tomorrow night I'll be on a plane heading to Darwin, and I already know I'll be sitting by the window. Checking in before even arriving at the airport seems somehow counter-productive. Convenient though!
So Semester One is officially over, for me at least. I handed my last assignments in this morning, presented my drama micro-lesson to the class, caught up with the crew for coffee one last time, then left uni in rather high spirits ... albeit slowly due to the crutches.
My foot is still broken, but I believe it is healing. I'm done with the crutches. I detest them ... they cause more pain to my hands and arms than walking does to my foot. I've spent the last two weeks keeping weight off my foot ... hopefully that's enough. I may take a ridiculous looking walking stick with me though, to help take the weight a little. Plus, I'm hoping my lovely new hiking boots will help a bit. And we'll be spending a fair bit of time in the car. Fingers crossed all will be fine.
I think I'm just about ready to go. I have a to-do list that I'm working through slowly. I still have to pack, but I have a pretty good list of what needs to be packed. Most of it has already gone ... my uncle left here on Thursday, so I put as much into the vehicle as possible. He's already in the Northern Territory ... should get to Darwin sometime tomorrow. I arrive tomorrow night, then we spend a couple of days stocking up and getting sorted ... then head off. Exciting!
Meanwhile, I need to get some sleep! I can't believe how tired I am ... it's crazy. This semester has been awfully draining ... everyone has said so, it's not just me. Crazy though, seeing as this was my "lazy semester" ... only three subjects and no outside work, yet still I'm more exhausted than I was last semester. I'm blaming the evil literacy subject. Evil, I say!
Crutches are not fun! But I'm getting used to them I think. Last night my hands were red and sore and bruised and felt like they were swelling to twice the size. Tonight, not so bad. A little sore, but there's really no comparison. My upper arms are going to be so strong by the end of this ... last night I couldn't lift my arms above shoulder height. Again, doing a bit better now. I'm surprised by how quickly it's becoming easier actually.
My foot is still sore. Not surprising though. My toes look really short because my foot is so swollen. When I put my foot on the ground, my toes don't even touch the ground. It looks so odd! And there's all this bruising too ... so attractive. But I'm resting it heaps ... so hopefully it will continue to heal. One advantage of having so many assignments ... at least the bulk of what I'm doing is sitting at the computer.
I scanned my x-rays in ... because I'm a little odd like that. They're intriguing, for me at least! And I thought I'd share.
It's fractured! I'm on crutches for the next two weeks. Likely to take six weeks to heal. How ridiculously bad is my timing? Can't believe it. I keep shaking my head and laughing at myself. Then getting annoyed. Then laughing again. It's ridiculous!
The x-ray findings state: "There is a horizontal fracture through the base of the left 5th metatarsal without displacement." It's really easy to see on the x-rays. Explains the severe pain. And I continued to walk on it for over 36 hours. Clever.
My foot is now strapped, and I'm on crutches. Could have had plaster, but the doctor suggested it wasn't necessary if I'm careful to stay off it. Works for me. I'm slowly getting the hang of the crutches, but not a huge fan. I have the forearm ones ... might end up changing to underarm ones. Meanwhile, I'm keeping my foot up as much as I can.
I told the doctor about my travel plans. He said I should go. I won't be doing much hiking now, but I can still sit in the 4wd. He even said I might be right to drive after a while. I'll hopefully be off the crutches before I go, then just taking it easy. Gradually using it more. By the time we get in to central Australia, I'll hopefully be walking okay. That's almost six weeks away still. Doubt I'll be climbing the rock though!
Life got busy again. It always does. All kinds of stuff happening. Gumnuts started ... a new Guide unit for 5 and 6 year olds. Eleven girls came along for the sign up day! They were all born this century ... how to make a girl feel old! At uni, assignments are all coming due ... I really should be spending more time working on them. Hard to prioritise, although my stress levels at the moment are surprisingly quite low. Not sure how much longer that will lost.
Loads to organise for the outback trip. Accommodation is now sorted for the central Australia part ... very nice five-star deluxe spa hotel rooms at Ayers Rock, Kings Canyon and Alice Springs. I've never stayed anywhere quite so fancy. After three weeks of sleeping in a swag under the stars on the side of the track ... it's going to be the most appreciated accommodation ever! Fancy or not. I've also been shopping over the last couple of days for quick dry, sun protective, moisture transfer, mosquito repellant (no kidding!) travel wear. Gradually nearing being ready I think!
And in amongst all this ... Stella, a friend from London, came to visited over the last couple of days. Such fun. A perfect excuse to push the study aside for 24 hours or so. We spent last night in town exploring what Brisbane has to offer on a Sunday night (more than I expected, I must admit!). It was fun ... a trip up to Mt Coot-tha, dinner at South Bank, a ferry trip down the river, walking through the Queen St Mall then back to South Bank. All was lovely ... until I tripped over the curb. And did something nasty to my foot.
Seriously, can there be a more dull way to injure one's self? I was completely sober, I wasn't even doing anything silly ... I was just checking for traffic and looking where I was going, and the ground underneath me was uneven so I tripped. And now I'm hobbling, and everyone asks what happened. I don't even have an impressive story to tell. I have to admit it was pure clumsiness. So pathetic!
Meanwhile ... we were on the other side of the river, so after it happened I had to walk all the way over the Grey St bridge, through South Bank and back to my car (near the cinema) before I could pull out an instant ice pack from my first aid kit and ice it. Severe pain the entire way, and major swelling almost instantaneously. Really appreciated having the fully stocked first aid kit on board! Too bad the car was so far away though. Ice pack still helped of course, and then we bandaged it so I could drive home ... it's my left foot at least, but I drive manual so it was still far from fun!
The irony of this whole situation ... Stella is a podiatrist! Of all things I could have done while she is in town ... I have to go and injure my foot. Pretty classic, really. It would be like having a mid-life crisis while a psychiatrist friend was visiting, or losing my passport while visiting my Vice Consul friend. Rather convenient though. Stella kindly strapped my foot this morning, and offered all kinds of tips along the way.
Isn't feeling a great deal better though ... today I had a drama workshop at uni, then I took Stella to the museum, then after dropping Stella at the airport I called in to DFO to look for cheap travel wear ... so I've been walking (read: hobbling) almost non-stop all day (and as such in severe pain the entire time). Tried to rest it as much as I could ... but hard when there's so much to do.
Tonight, I finally went to the doctor (first appointment I could get), and tomorrow I have to get an x-ray. The doctor said I might have been walking around on a broken bone all day. The fifth metatarsal, assuming I read the radiology request correctly. Comforting thought. I pointed out that I've been walking all day ... so surely it can't be broken? Apparently it can. More likely a pulled tendon I suspect. I guess I'll know more tomorrow.
Such perfect timing! Hoping such injuries can heal within a couple of weeks. Two weeks tomorrow I fly to Darwin. Hiking in central Australia won't be much fun with an injured foot. Even with lovely new hiking boots.
When did day to day life become such a mad rush? When did it become so hard to fit everything into a day? Who is responsible? Or what, perhaps? What caused us to speed up our day to day lives so much? From where comes this insane need to do everything at such a frantic pace?
It's no longer enough to just work, or just study, or just volunteer, or just raise a family ... we have to do everything at once. As though trying to do just one is a waste. A waste of what though? A waste of time? A waste of a life? A waste of potential energy? A waste of ability?
I'm easily one of the worst offenders. I'm the first to admit that. It's a little hard to deny. I try to cram far too much into my life ... as though if I don't do it all now, I might miss out. Which is entirely possible I guess ... who knows what lies around the corner.
But is it wise? Is my enjoyment and commitment to each aspect of my life diminished because it is shared with so much else? Or is it strengthened? Does each somehow contribute to and build on the others? I have no idea. Is my life as a whole better or worse because I do so much? There must be a happy medium somewhere, but where is it? Have I surpassed it? If so, by how much? How do I know?
And what am I missing out on if I don't do everything? The experiences. The friendships. The memories. The fun. The learning. The satisfaction. Okay, a lot. But if I do less, would I get more out of the things I keep doing? Would I get enough to make up for what I miss out on by not doing some things? That, my friend, is the question.
The inspiration for this line of wonder ... I just watched Pride & Prejudice, again. And I love how they have time to wander through the woods and just think about things; or how they can sit under a tree and read a book; or decide on a whim to walk into town to check out the men. It's so relaxed; so appealing.
Perhaps a lot of that has to do with environment ... it's not like I live anywhere near the gorgeous woods of Derbyshire. And to be fair, there are many things we do now for the same purpose that would never have been done in Jane Austen's time. But somehow everything we do now seems far more hectic than the activities of Elizabeth Bennett, and Mr Knightley, and the Dashwood sisters. Or is it just my imagination?
I just finished the first of my two huge assignments that I need to complete this weekend! Well, kind of finished. I've finished the part that's actually assessed. The big, scary, project overview part that I've been working on for the last two and a half days. I've also finished the reading summaries that aren't assessed. I still have four online tasks to finish and print off that have to be handed in but which aren't assessed. The cruelty! Spending precious hours working on something that doesn't even count when I could be working on the next assignment. Or even better, having an actually holiday weekend.
This easily has to qualify as the most depressingly boring and anti-social Easter weekend ever! Who spends four entire days doing nothing but studying? On a holiday! Seriously ... it's pathetic. Unavoidable, but pathetic. Productive at least, but pathetic. Bring on the moment when the assignments are done! I can't wait to have an actual break. So much to do! So much non-study, non-Guide stuff to do. Emails to write, photos to label, movies to see - desperately want to see Becoming Jane! People to visit, presents to send, books to read, SES study to do, lunches to have, the list goes on.
But first, I must eat. Then finish the online tasks. Then sleep, get up, and start all over on the next assignment. Tragic.